


tea-time and pretty red hair.

by Porkbunz_zz



Category: 13 Reasons Why (TV)
Genre: And Bryce and Monty...still need to die, Angst, Clay needs a hug, Didn't Know They Were Dating, Drabble, F/M, Hallucinations, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, More like-this is one of those heart-warming moments that play into relationship buildup, So does Justin, fluff at the end, kinda-sorta
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-30 21:41:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20104042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Porkbunz_zz/pseuds/Porkbunz_zz
Summary: There's a fire in my eyes love. I don't think you understand."It's ok Jensen."So I’m a little mad-big deal! We all are. He can go ahead and know(But not the others. We’re not having a tea-party. Just a few drinks should be fine-gulp-gulp-ahhh).





	tea-time and pretty red hair.

**Author's Note:**

> Been wanting to write something for this fandom for a damn year now. Apologies it took so long. I'm quite surprised at the lack of Clustin and Clannah. Mainly Clannah given that this WHOLE show is BASED on their relationship, smh. Nothing against Tony-love the idiot. But...TF UP WITH ALL THE TONY/CLAY?!?!? WHERE'S HANNAH IN ALL THIS? YOU TELLING ME EVEN WHEN THE STORY REVOLVES AROUND HER, SHE DEAD?! SMH.SMH.SMH...
> 
> -Dark, red roses represent mourning, loss, tragedy, beauty, etc. Keep that in mind.

There’s a fire in my eyes love. I don’t think you understand. You see-_ drip.drop.- _ I’ve never seen such beautiful red-hair- _ drip. _ -smoky, matted and curly- _ drop _ . Like sizzling embers, they _ burn(mememe) _and it’s how I know there’s ice in my veins. Huh...Ice in my veins. Funny.

_ Drip.drip. _

Did you know that darling? 

_ “You’re a dark, crimson rose.” _

Yes. I suppose you did. Maybe you do understand? 

_ “Tastes like sour honey.” _

Do you think...you think I could-how do I…

_ “love.love.love.” _

Could I eat your heart?

It just looks so _ pretty _in my hands! So soft, so big, so golden-the world doesn’t deserve you. 

_ “Helmet…” _

Perhaps I don’t either.

_ “Clay.” _

I killed you after all didn’t I ?

-but then your hands are on me and you taste like cherries and sweet _ dreams _ ( _ “sour honey” _ ) and oh-what am I saying. I _ really _ don’t deserve you. 

“_ Clay. _”

_ Ba-dump.Ba-dump. _

You’re eyes are a lovely shade of green you know. I can see starlight and morning dew in them. Glossy and porcelain like your skin. What a doll. You were _ such _a doll. I’m sorry they broke you. 

_drip. _

If I close my eyes, I can cast spells. Curses on those _ bitches…! _

You’re crying. 

oops!

Sorry. I didn’t mean to be so cruel. I’ll try to be better for you _ next _time.

-Your lips move in on me, closer, closer. Whisper in my ears-_ oh _

_ “Dead men tell no tales” _

_ Snap.Crackle.Pop. _

I’m not holding you anymore. 

Your neck splays atop my legs in an odd angle, blood pouring from the side. Beady-fish eyes look at me from below-what with your head in my lap(and the breathtaking flames adorning it). No movement. Only silence.

**.**

**.**

**.**

There’s a hollow expression on your face-like ash in your skin. It’s as if you were never here. And dear, you’ve never looked more _ haunting _ (gorgeousgourgeousgorgeous-) _ . _Suddenly, your mouth starts moving and I know they’re your final words-

“_ No next times…” _

Roses spill and cascade like melted chocolate on an open book. There’s a whole galaxy of wine around my knees-around _ you- _from your throat. So much liquid red, my fingers pale in the syrupy-substance.

“Hannah...?”

where are you?

where did you go?

“Hannah…?”

_ drip.drop. _

“Aaaahhhh!!!”

There’s glass inside me-it’s no secret. I think you know, that’s why I’m telling you, even if you can’t hear me. Because you’re breaking it-along with my soul. Happily. Not giving a _ damn. _

Hahaha!

That’s why you’re here.

Hahahaha!

No seriously, where are you? 

I don’t see you(too much crimson-we’re both drowning in it).

_ sweep.sweep. _

Huh...?

_ sweep.sweep. _

What’s that ?

“Shhh…”

“.....”

“It’s ok Jensen...” 

“.....”

“It’s ok...”

Big, strong arms are wrapped around me, palms resting gently across my chest. I’m still on the floor. We both are. There’s a heavy scent of cologne. Pinewood?

_ Ba-dump, Ba-dump. _

Everything’s so warm-like someone’s picking up the glass shards and putting them back together. He is, it seems(when did he even-). He’s trying anyways…

But-

“No.”

“Clay-”

Perhaps he’s_ trying _to eat my organ too-what was it called? That thing that starts with an h…?

“NonoNONONO!”

I can’t let him win! He can’t steal me-won’t let him!

“I’ve got you.”

I’ll fly away with my plucked butterfly wings!(oh haven’t you heard? They melted in the glint of the shimmering sun-the day _ you _ left. I’ve tried flying since then. Won’t work.)

“No-”

(You’re still the angel while I’m a fallen one-if I wasn’t already dancing with the devil-that is.)

“I’m not her. But I've got you.”

“....”

“Just focus on that. Focus on that Jensen. That’s all that matters-that i’m here.”

Not really. Not when she’s gone idiot.

“I can’t so get off!”

But he doesn’t. Not when I’m pushing and he’s shoving and we’re fighting and _ damn, _he’s still stronger than me-homelessness not doing its job properly. Suddenly, I’m beneath him. His face is close and it’s hard to breathe.

“Get off…”

Still refuses. There’s stars in my eyes-I feel so hothot_ hot. _

Must be the anger.

“GET OFF!”

To hell with him!

“...please…”

Crap. That wasn’t supposed to come out so pathetic. I wasn’t supposed to start crying. Fuck. Fuck. F-

Still…

He’s already caught onto my secret of talking to ghosts(you’d be alive if you were one, despite asphyxiation. Would you like that?). _ So _ I’m a little mad-big deal! We all are. He can go ahead and know(But not the others. We’re not having a tea-party. Just a few drinks should be fine- _ gulp-gulp-ahhh _).

The boy gets off, pulling his hand towards me(and making me want to fly again). He wants to try to call a truce. Heh, I’d rather cut my own arms and feed ‘em to myself, hmph…!

(what _ would _ you like? Do I _ have _to be a deep, crimson rose?)

I grab his palm anyways, that stupid fuzzy feeling returning and we sit against my bedroom walls, completely quiet. 

Then he speaks. Bastard…

“I’m sorry.”

“....”

“I’m so sorry…”

What…?

“I’m sorry that she’s gone.”

“....”

“I’m sorry that I got to kiss her and you didn’t.”

_ Ba-dump, ba-dump. _

“I’m sorry for being such a jerk.”

“I’m sorry for causing you more trouble even after leaving, after coming back.”

“I’m so sorry Clay, I’m just so sorry-”

“-stop.”

Let me rest my head against your shoulders _ dear _, tea time isn’t over. 

“Just...shut up...”

“Jen-”

Squeeze your fingers a little, tight clasp like honeyhoney_honey _(and cicadas during summer).

Maybe then you’ll understand.

“Listen to the ceiling fan-”

“What the f-”

“Listen to the winds-the way it swishes and swashes-can you hear it?”

“...yeah, I..."

There's a steady beat of silence. Only the sound of artificial wind. s_woosh.swoosh. _His shoulders stop tensing. So do mine. 

"Ok. I can do that. Can you?"

Close my eyes. You know the rest Finkle(Foley but this makes you sound less appealing so-). 

(The party’s barely begun.)

I’ll even pretend not to notice the heavy breathing or the way you ruffle my hair. 

(It’s not a pity party though. I’ve got a new guest besides _ you _darling. A lovely new addition, you don’t mind too much, I’m sure. You did love him once after all, before I existed. Probably still do, just a little, just a little. That’s fine. I guess I can see the charm-not that I'll ever tell him.) 

**Author's Note:**

> Here's the thing: I planned on doing a second part from Justin's p.o.v.
> 
> Problem? I don't hate this but it doesn't sound as dreamy and prosy and wonky as was planned. I was going for an Alice in Wonderland vibe and failed miserably. Part of me is thinking of re-doing this entire thing, nother part of me feels too attached knowing this isn't exactly bad(least I have some confidence, aye?). Just not what I wanted.
> 
> ...What do you think, huh? Should I re-attempt and then do Justin's perspective or should I just do Justin's perspective? 
> 
> Thx for reading, Porkz! ~


End file.
